An Exercise to Help Your Team Feel More Comfortable with Conflict

It is important to reach out to your doctor or a mental health professional for a diagnosis and treatment. Cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT) and medication have both been empirically shown effective in the treatment of social anxiety disorder (SAD). The first example is respectful and conveys a desire to preserve the relationship and resolve the conflict without drama. Jane has an opportunity to explain or own her behavior, make things right, and salvage the friendship. The second confrontation is abrasive and seems like an attempt to label Jane as a bad person and call off the friendship.

Help for the Conflict Avoidant

When you can recognize conflicting needs and are willing to examine them with compassion and understanding, it can lead to creative problem solving, team building, and stronger relationships. To state the obvious, we aren’t happier when we come out of conflict worse off, feeling like we haven’t been heard or have been misunderstood. Conflict is yet another challenge we all must deal with throughout our careers, and it is how to deal with someone who avoids conflict often not something we were taught how to handle. For many people, the natural reaction is to avoid it or address it head-on without taking into consideration the other person or circumstances. You can practice these exposures either in real life (in vivo) or in your imagination to start. This means starting out with situations that cause you the least anxiety and eventually working up to what causes you the most fear.

Working with People Who Avoid Conflict

When we begin to tell the truth to ourselves, the will to make the changes can grow larger and the relationship has a chance to flourish right alongside our enhanced sense of self. If a conflict is going nowhere, you can choose to disengage and move on. Resolving conflict is impossible if you’re unwilling or unable to forgive others. Resolution lies in releasing the urge to punish, which can serve only to deplete and drain your life. When you are optimistic and concentrate on a positive outcome, you are more likely to stay focused on a solution rather than on the other person.

This people-pleasing behavior can also make it difficult to set and maintain boundaries. This may be what your mate is trying to do when they practice conflict avoidance in relationships. It could take a lot of talking and getting them to understand that they can say what they feel. There are a few reasons someone may be skilled at avoiding conflict in relationships.

Conflict Avoidance Doesn’t Do You Any Favors

Jane is more likely to be hurt, defensive, and attack back without reflecting on her own behavior. Despite different approaches to confrontation, there are some personality types who may not receive it constructively. This anxiety might cause you to avoid or sidestep important conversations. During confrontations, you can try to practice anxiety-management techniques. Conflict avoidance can damage your relationships and harm your mental health.

Help for the Conflict Avoidant

Moreover, it may take you being understanding to them, even when you don’t want to be, especially if they were trying to protect your feelings by not arguing with you about a topic or event. They may need people to accept and like them, which could cause them to be unable to have a conflict with another person. If you experience this, keep reading for information on how to deal with a conflict avoidant spouse. UNICEF will continue to put the needs of children first, and to provide them with the support they need to recover from the toxic stress they experience.

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